Note 8 at Eph. 5:4: As Paul listed the things which are unbecoming to saints (v. 3), he included some things in this verse which come as a surprise to many Christians today. He tells us not to use "foolish talking" and "jesting, which are not convenient."

The Greek word which was translated "foolish" literally meant "silly talk" or "buffoonery." Paul is basically repeating a statement he made in chapter 4, verse 29. Silliness is not a godly trait. This is not to say that there is no place for joy and fun in the Christian life. Jesus Himself was anointed with the oil of gladness more than anyone around Him (Heb. 1:9). Jesus had a good time, but He was never silly.

Next Paul mentions jesting, but he qualifies this with specifying jesting which is not convenient. That means there is some jesting which is convenient. The word "convenient" literally means "to be suitable." Synonyms for "convenient" are "appropriate, good, suitable, useful." Joking with a person in an appropriate, good, and suitable way can be very useful to building relationships. But jesting with a person in an inappropriate way can be very damaging. It is not always easy to know what type of jesting is appropriate, but it can definitely be said that if the person you are kidding doesn't like it, it is inappropriate.

The NRSV translates this verse as, "Entirely out of place is obscene, silly, and vulgar talk; but instead, let there be thanksgiving." The NIV translates it as, "Nor should there be obscenity, foolish talk or coarse joking, which are out of place, but rather thanksgiving."

Note 9 at Eph. 5:4: Paul is saying that thanksgiving is the opposite of the filthiness, foolish talking, and inappropriate jesting he had just condemned. Thanksgiving takes humility. A proud person isn't thankful. He only thinks of himself. All the things Paul is condemning in these verses are rooted in selfishness. If our motive is to bless others, then our jesting will always be appropriate and not the type Paul is rebuking here.