Audio commentary on this verse

Note 15 at Rom. 12:20: These coals of fire are not coals of punishment or torment, but rather conviction. If this was urging us to be kind to our enemies because that would hurt them more than anything else, then that would be violating the context of this verse. Paul is telling us to live peaceably with all men (v. 18) and to render to no man evil for evil (v. 17). God's kind of love is being promoted, not some scriptural way to hurt those who hurt you.

When we walk in love towards those who hurt us, it heaps conviction on them. They know what their reaction would be if they were in our place and to see us walk in love under adverse circumstances shows them that we have something special that they don't have.

Paul should know. He saw Stephen forgive and pray for the very people who stoned him to death. When Jesus appeared to him on the road to Damascus, He told Paul that it was hard to kick against the pricks. The Lord was saying it was hard for Saul to resist the conviction that had come to him through Stephen's witness (see note 6 at Acts 9:5, p. 621).